Spirit of the Crow

I’ve been through a range of emotions and experiences the past few weeks. “Frustration” was the word of the week two weeks ago. On a Sunday at the beginning of that time span, I found myself trying to handle and discipline all ten of my boys on my own. One of the fellow volunteers from my house went with a group to the basketball court down the road, and the other went... well, I’m not actually sure (more on this later). This left me alone with the boys on the day with the most free time, and therefore, the day with the highest likelihood of mischief.

Half the boys were finishing up a punishment where they weren’t allowed to play soccer and I had to keep my eye on them to make sure they didn’t sneak outside. At the same time, some female volunteers had set up a slip-n-slide for the girls near the river--conveniently visible (for my boys) from our upstairs window. I spent all afternoon running up and down the stairs asking, and at times, physically pushing the kids away from their view. But, right as I finished one battle upstairs, another one would start downstairs as someone tried to slip out the back door and head to the soccer field. All of this was complicated by a stomach bug that had me running to the bathroom ready to explode about every hour.

By the end of the day, nearly all my boys were serving one or more punishments including, but not limited to, no soccer, chopping 200 pieces of wood for the kitchen, and no seconds at mealtimes. I too felt punished as my stomach issues had only gotten worse. The next four days, my appetite dwindled and I felt pretty dehydrated and weak. But, just as quickly as it had come, it passed, and I was soon back to my regular, ravenously hungry self.

I have to admit, things would have been a lot easier had my roommate been around to assist me. He kind of has a knack for disappearing at the most crucial times. Actually, he has a knack for disappearing all the time. When he isn’t missing, it’s almost certain he’s in our room studying his Bible, reading Spirit of Prophecy, or praying. I have a huge amount of respect and admiration for his personal spiritual life, but when it comes to doing his part around the house, my respect for him disappears. I feel I am the perfect opposite of him. My personal spiritual life exists, but I find myself getting into ruts and doing it for the sake of keeping a routine as opposed to because I truly want to dig into God’s Word; I’m a work in progress. In contrast, I feel as though I’m a workhorse when it comes to helping out in the house, with the kids, or in the fields. Maybe we can learn a few things from each other.

In addition to the differences in work ethic and spirituality, there are also some cultural differences in how we view personal property (he isn’t American). When he first moved in, I noticed my toilet paper supply was disappearing far more quickly than it had been before (this was before the stomach bug, mind you). Furthermore and much to my dismay, I found my only slightly used bar of hand soap reduced to a tiny sliver one evening after he had showered. Don’t get me wrong, I have no issues with sharing, but with nine months left to go, I don’t want to be fronting the bill for all the TP and soap. We’ve since worked out a fair deal, but I’ve now learned that not every roommate will be Caleb Miller status (love ya buddy, hope you’re reading this).

As the week progressed, my frustration turned to sadness when I learned that three of my boys were being sent home. I’m not supposed to talk about the reason they were kicked out, but I can say that they could really use some prayer right now. It’s not going to be easy for them to shake the issue they are currently dealing with, and it only worsens in their less-than-desirable home environments. One boy begged to stay as he couldn’t stand the thought of going home and telling his parents what he did. But, unfortunately, the director has to stick to the rules and we were unable to allow him to stay. It was really hard having to say goodbye to my kids in that way, but I will still have them in my heart and prayers.

The same boy who begged to stay actually happens to be the one who came up with my new nickname, “Teacher Malo”, mentioned in my last post. Thankfully, we went our separate ways on pretty good terms, and both he and the other two will have the opportunity to come back next year after they are re-evaluated. With his departure my old nickname will likely die, but I already think I’m earning a new one: “Teacher Loco” (crazy). One day during English class, I was playing a game with the students to review for their upcoming test. It involved running up to the whiteboard and pointing to the correct word in English after I said the same word in Spanish. One senior had the brilliant idea that we should point with our noses rather than our fingers. I had the brilliant idea to DEMONSTRATE just how dumb his idea was, which, in hindsight, was probably even more dumb. The words were written on the board anywhere from waist height to a couple inches above my head. “Surely these small Bolivians won’t be able to reach all the words with their noses”, I thought-- “I’ll show them.” In that moment, I felt as though the spirit of the crow (that from the Windex commercials) came over me and I swooped in at full speed toward the board. Not only did I point to the word with my nose, I also had enough force to erase it and write a new word in red too! (slight exaggeration) Needless to say, I was a little dazed after my little stunt and turned around to face the class with a bloody nose and a goofy grin on my face--I showed them, alright.

By the start of the next week, my emotions had completely shifted to a state of carefree excitement. In Bolivia, there is a holiday called “El Día de los Estudiantes” (Day of the Students). During this holiday, all the schools have a special event on a specific Friday near the end of the year (school finishes in November here) in which the students are celebrated. We were able to raise some money to give the kids a field trip to a pool in Rurre, a soccer tournament with prizes, and a special dinner. I was especially excited for the tournament as I was one of the volunteers assigned to help “make” the soccer field. We put up brand new goals and used hoes to chop in sidelines, goalie boxes, corner kick arcs, and even a midfield line with a large circle around the center. The field worked beautifully for the tournament and it was really fulfilling to see the kids benefit directly from something I had helped with.

All this up and down with my emotions made for a hectic couple of weeks. That being said, I can now look back and learn something from it. Life is never going to be emotionally flat-lined. Just like during these past two weeks, I have bounced and will continue to bounce from high to low points in my life and walk with God. The upside to this is that if I ask God to control the direction of my life, I can be sure that this roller coaster ride is what He wants, or even needs me to experience. I don’t believe that God causes bad things to happen, but maybe there’s a crucial lesson I need to learn in which case He will ALLOW something bad to happen in order to teach me. It’s quite comforting knowing that in the good and bad, with God, I am always progressing and growing.

TL;DR

Frustration. Sadness. Carefree excitement. The past two weeks have been a ride. I experienced what it’s like to be a single father of ten in a different language. Didn’t really help that my roommate was MIA all afternoon. My roommate and I definitely have our differences, but maybe we can teach each other a thing or two. Three of my boys were sent home after breaking some major rules; they really need OUR prayers as their homes are not the best environments in which to battle their current struggles. I almost single-handedly broke my nose. ¡El Día de los Estudiantes fue un éxito! Life’s a roller coaster, God’s the seat belt.